I'm Going Deeper Underground.

Today, I ventured into The Depths once more.

I also went back to Darkroot Garden first though, so let's talk about that.

Y'know those Giant Stone Knights? I hate them. They're slow but they're dangerous, mainly because if you get too close to them they'll cast a complete pain in the arse of a spell that slows you down, stops you from rolling, and essentially means that you'll quite likely be seeing a bonfire pretty soon.

Furthermore, the even bigger pain in the arse thing about that spell is that there's no way of telling whether it's still active or not without getting affected by it.

And if you want the Wolf Ring (which is really bloody useful (I've learned properly about Poise recently)), you have to go through two of those fuckers. And some frog rays if you go about it the wrong way.

Fuckers.

A couple of deaths later, I'd twigged that as long as you don't stay too close to the knights they won't cast that spell, and they're actually pretty easy to dodge out the way of and slap about from behind - also, using a weapon that does strike damage seems to do more damage than a sword.

So, Wolf ring equipped, I decided to run back to the Depths - hoping that this time, I wouldn't get buggered quite so hard by the chap with the massive cleavers.

Making my way down towards the kitchen, I was ready to rock. Blades sharp, shield raised, will strong.

Then I rolled off a platform and was instantly lost. This dismayed me, as you can imagine - and when I turned  the corner, I was dismayed further when (what I thought was) the butcher I was looking for dropped down to fight me. Turns out they'e slow as fuck though, and if they're on their own, you get a pillar between you and them it's super easy to literally run circles around them and stab them up.

When they're with dogs, on the other hand, they're still a pain in the cock - as I quickly found out as I found my way back to the kitchen area, after freeing a chap in a barrel, who I can only assume is in that barrel in order to to trick you into attack him, just as you have every other man in a barrel you've seen up to this point. Fucking Dark Souls. 

I' not going to describe the Depths blow-by-blow, because I don't think it'd be all that interesting, I got lost a fair amount, and it probably took me far longer to traverse the arena than it should have. Instead, I'll just serve up a few delicious highlights and thoughts:

The Environment

The Depths is a difficult place to traverse. It is the first place that will literally remove the floor from underneath you, the first place to deliberately drop enemies on your head (made even worse by the fact that the area is a) dark and b) covered in stuff that looks similar to the Slimes themselves), and also deliberately hides passages and paths in plain sight because nobody's turned the fucking lights on. Falling into the trap and being surrounded by Basilisks was fucking horrible.

I think I'll write a longer piece on this place too. In fact, maybe I'll write a series of posts about all of the areas.

Anyway.

Basilisks

I don't know what I think Basilisks look like, but I know I absolutely wasn't expecting the giant eyed, curse-misting fuckfrogs that came bounding towards me when somebody told me that Basilisks live in the bottom of the Depths. I managed to avoid getting cursed (mainly because I'd heard of others getting cursed and was fucking terrified of it), but every time I saw one of the bastards come flopping and bounding around the corner with their giant red balloony eyes and their smoker's cough I tensed up and started rolling, running, and crying. Horrible fucking things. If I hadn't been capable of one-shotting them, I would've been fucked.

Rats!

The giant rat wasn't too much of a problem, I found - I actually managed to take him down without being hit once. He's got way less health than I expected (although that might have something to do with the axe sticking out of his face), but the first time the slightly bigger than normal rats came at me, it scared the absolute shit out of me. It was a proper "hang on, that's not as close as I OH JESUS FUCKING CHRIST" moment, which is a type of terrified the game hadn't made me up to that point, so that was nice.

Slimes

Talking of new kinds of terrified, watching that slime falling from the ceiling and sucking almost all of my health was horrifying - I was carrying a pretty hefty cargo of souls at this point, and the frankly cheap way it attacks you is a genuine dick move.

In fact, everything about the slimes feels like a dick move. More often than not they're little more than barriers that absorb way too much damage and just get in the fucking way - especially the ones that stand between you and the Gaping (hur hur) Dragon.

The Channeller

Dead in two hits. Had one swing at me, which I blocked easily. Can't believe how scared I was of the one in the Undead Parish. Prick.

The Bonfire

I did The Depths (apart from the Gaping Dragon) in a single attempt, but it took me an extremely long time to find the bonfire. In fact, by the time I got there my Estus flask was empty (I'd originally only nipped into the Depths to see how far I got before banging my head on something hideous). As such, I was pretty fucking soul-rich by the time I found it, and words cannot describe the relief I felt when I found that Bonfire - something I hadn't felt since the time I almost cried when I got to the bonfire near Andre.

I took the time to Kindle and reverse Hollowing, and was interested to see just how many summon signs I saw in the room - this should have really telegraphed to me that what was the other side of the fog was... less than friendly.

Domnhall

He's weird. I quite like the look of some of those crystal weapons he's got, and his helmet is badass too - but who'd choose to sit in the bottom of a sewer, right outside the gate to (what I assume is) Blighttown?

The Gaping Dragon

Oh boy. What a horrible looking thing. On my way to fight him for the first tie I stumbled across Solaire's summon sign, so I decided to take him along for the fight - not that it really mattered, as my first fight with the Dragon lasted just a few seconds as the fucker trampled me right out of the gate. 

The gaper (hur hur) took me a few attempts but as usual, once you learn a few things, the fight is actually pretty simple:

• Don't bring Solaire with you. Just don't. He does almost know damage to the thing, dies really quickly, and just means that the dragon has more hit points than it usually would.
• Pick your moments carefully - and be aware of how long they are. As soon as the dragon opens its giant mouth and slams down, attack its head. It'll wobble like a bobblehead, and you should be able to get a couple of good two-handed swipes into him. Do not push your luck. Once you've got a couple of shots in, run to the side. As the dragon starts to move, run past him and jam your sword up his arse a few times. Again; don't hang around too much unless you want to get twatted by his tail. Do this a zillion times.
• Don't run off the edge. Even when he's chasing you.
• Make sure you get rid of the channeller before this fight. He will fuck you up royally if you don't. 

Boom. One dead Gaping Dragon.

The Depths is basically only a pain in the arse because it's so difficult to find your way round - the tunnels and pathways all look the same, and there are so many blocked off doorways it's very easy to miss the open ones. Frankly, I didn't think the Basilisks were as much of a pain as people make out - I didn't get cursed, and they were pretty easy to take out. The Dragon was fun, but once you see the strings it's fairly simple to get through it (so long as you're content to spend too long wailing on it), but overall I actually really enjoyed the depths. It reminded me of Resident Evil 2, for some reason. Maybe it's all the backtracking.

But now, I find myself with the key to Blighttown in my possession - which I'm taking as a fairly un-ignorable sign that it's time to go to Blighttown.

FUCK.